Week 5

WARNING: This blog was originally made to track progress on my various goals. After Kris passed it somehow turned into a "pity party" for myself blog where I whined a lot. Lately it has been where I track my progress on a wonderful diet that has been working. TODAY it will briefly track my progress... then revert back to my poor me for a while... If you are only one here to view my progress, don't bother going past my measurements...

Well I weighed in this morning after I found an unwanted monthly visitor... can we say BLOATED (I hope). SO I weighed myself on old scale hoping it would make me feel better... yeah not much. But I must admit, I had a rough week, and as I mentioned before I am an emotional eater.

Weight- 181 lbs.
Neck - 13ins.
Chest - 38 ins.
Waist - 36.5 ins.
Hips- 41ins.
Arms - 13ins.
Thighs - 22.5ins.


Now for the poor me... Depression has always been something i have struggled with since I was 13. It has never been consistant, I have been able to manage it with medication, and avoiding things I learn trigger it. But lately it just hits and I don't expect it so I don't have the warning signs to catch it with medication. And my medication is another issue, after YEARS on the same one that has ALWAYS worked, lately it makes me really sick to my stomach... so change it right? But I have no insurance at the moment... so do I deal with feeling sick to my stomach all day, or do I fight the depression on my own? I know since this is a post my experience with Freelife, someone will mention try the "jule" I have been. But the triggers are overwhelming sometimes. it has been almost 28 months since I lost my husband, silly reminders come up and hit completely unexpected, and I just miss him more than anything right now. I have grown a ton since he has been gone, and become very independent, I am proud of what I have accomplished on my own. But it sucks not being able to share it with either of my 2 biggest fans. I try the whole dating thing thinking I am ready... but  if I am being honest with myself I am not. I feel like I am dating to force some time for me... I do not find time for me, or things I like to do unless I am obligated somehow with someone else. I miss being creative, scrapbooking, sewing for fun, decorating for holidays, dancing, I need to find a way to make time for things I want to do. I know I need to get through school, but I am so overwhelmed, I find myself falling further and further behind. I would love to become more involved in this company my sister has introduced me to, however it is my last priority being a single mom. I have obligations for the kids... Bren there is scouting (which is almost done) college apps, graduation, ballroom team, wrestling (which is nearly done), dance classes. My oldest daughter, dance company, babysitting, school, church, and now softball team. My next daughter has dance, debate, church, and my youngest I feel gets neglected, but he still has school, scouts, and dance. How do I keep up with all those schedule, and my work, and my school, and still have time for me? This past weekend, I spend every free minute in bed.... I slept, not becuase I was tired, but I knew depression was coming, I didn't want to face things I knew I needed to. Then there is the house. I am tired of not having time to clean it, I feel like I still have boxes to unpack and sort. I hate not being organized like I used to be. So really if I took time to get involved in this company and make money I could afford to pay someone to help clean, freeing up sometime. I struggle with whether or not it is worth it to be going to school... I know it is what I need, but maybe I just need to be realistic and take a little more time and break up my schedule... but then I think I would rather just be DONE with it, and be able to get a job and take a long break from school. I miss having someone I felt I could be completely honest with, and open up to about all this... so writing is the next best thing. Kris and my mom where the only people I ever felt I coule be completely 100% honest about my feelings, and myself with... and I even struggled with them... I Know I am never even completely honest with myself about my feelings... it has always been something I struggle with...

END RANT... next week I will keep to my weigh in updates.

Week 4

So last week was my worst week on this... until this week. While I have struggled in the weight loss area, I have have thrived in other areas. The first being I can't remember the last time I craved diet coke. I have still gotten it a couple times, and only have a sip or two because it just isn't good. I am not a water drinker so I struggle getting enough water, but I have found a way to bribe myself. I found dasani flavor for water, and I tell myself if I drink a whole bottle, I can drink a bottle with flavor. As far as food, I crave much healthier food... but I am so busy, I struggle to find the time to fix it. I need to figure out a better schedule.

Also, my sleep habits are AWFUL! I am up way too late, and up way too early for any kind of effective sleep pattern. But I have mostly slept much sounder. I need to figure out a better routine. While I have more energy then I used to, I am not using it wisely. I am barely making it through the day, before I would need to take a nap so I didn't doze off while driving, I haven't had to do that, but I am still feeling very exhausted.

Now to the sad news... I was pretty down when I saw I had gained a little this week, and not lost much in inches, but I hadn't looked very closely at the date... It is my monthly time... so I am a little bloated... I think I can forgive myself for a heavy weigh in for that reason... (Plus there was another birthday at our house)

Also I have previously only been taking the taislim twice a day with my shakes, not with every meal 3 times a day... so this next week I will be doing that as well.

PICTURE TIME! (Just because I didn't lose doesn't mean I will deprive you a my gorgeous self)

UPDATE!!! Lesson learned... weigh in n the morning!!! I am down 2 more pounds! And here are better pics closer like I had done previously (It all depends on who is awake and willing to help me... and their level of patience)

(remember the new scale... go to the last entry to see the total weight loss)
Weight - 181 lbs.  179 lbs.
Neck - 13ins.
Chest - 39ins.
Waist - 37ins.
Hips - 41ins.
Arms - 13ins.
Thighs - 22.5ins

As always let me know if you want any info on this great product. I have loved the benefits of it, and would love to tell you more about it... as you have read, I am VERY honest about my experience on it!

TAISLIM INFO

Week 3

So I had a kinda bittersweet week... I got a new scale because my old one was tough to read, and seemed to bounce around. So when I stepped on the new one... I was back up to 180. I was crushed, I figured I had a rough week (it was my late husband's birthday, so I really emotionally pigged out) and figured with any diet there would be set backs.

Then came the day I try to weigh in and measure up, I lost 4.5 inches all around from last week... I guess I should finish measuring before I take the picture after I weigh in and look so grumpy.

Overall though I have felt pretty good. I am a single mom who works and goes to school, so I am always stressed, and running around crazy, so with all the craziness and high emotions this past week, I only had 1 break down, which is pretty good.

I have slept much more sound, I know I still don't get nearly enough sleep, but when I do, I feel much more sound. I am hoping to be able to slow down a little and get a normal sleep schedule, but we will see.

My cravings for junk food are almost gone. I buy diet coke out of habit, and a need to satisfy my emotional eating... but after a sip or two, I forget about it. Same with sweets... I have the biggest sweet tooth, and lately after a bite, I am just done.

So here are the pics, and digits... I hate the picture part because I have danced for so long it is more natural to suck in/ lift up, so I have to really concentrate to not lift up, then it turns to looking like I am sticking it out. SO after the bad pictures this week, I am just going to stand natural, and for me it is lifting up some...

I also included both pictures, of the old scale and the new so there is some transition. The old scale looks like I have lost another pound, but the new scale numbers show me way up. So not sure if I weighted more to start, or what, but after this week I am just taking pictures on the new one, but wanted proof I really didn't go up again.

Weight - 173/180

Neck - 13in

Chest - 39in

Waist - 37in

Hips - 41.5in

Arms - 13in

Thighs - 22.5

week 2

I am down 10 pounds!!! Can you believe it? Me neither! I have tried this week to be more aware of how I feel, and to be honest, I am still very emotional, and stressed, so I don't feel I can make a fair assessment... but in all honesty, I should be a WRECK right now, but I am handling things fairly well.

Can you believe over superbowl sunday, a birthday, and lots of small bites of stuff in between I am still down? It makes me want to work harder, exercise more, and see how much I really can lose.

I am loving this, I have saved money not eating at school, I don't get headaches from not eating, since I am satisfied, and never hungry on these shakes. I am feeling really good actually.

I have noticed my pants fitting kinda loose too. The kids all swear they can tell, although I don't see it myself... but here are the pictures, and the measurements so you can be the judge.

Weight - 175 pounds
Neck - 13 inches
Chest - 40 inches
Waist - 39 inches
Hips - 42 inches
Arms - 13.5 inches
Thighs - 23 inches

Again, if you want any info on these great product leave a comment!